Long Distance

Some people asked me “how was it to be in a long distance relationship?” Here is the story.

(It's a long story, hope you enjoy ;)

Long distance is not always easy. Things are even harder when I cannot get him through; when Blackberry Messenger is pending, he is not online at MSN Messenger, and he does not reply my message don’t know why. Those things make me feel alone and stuck.

The first and second day after I go back from Jakarta will be the hardest time, when I have to adapt that his arm is not here to be hug, his smile is not there to cheer me up, his hand is not there to hold, it’s time to realize that he is not physically here. I started missing him as soon as I said “goodbye, see you soon” at Jakarta airport. My heart always sinks and I try my best to hold my tears when the plane landed at Changi, Singapore. When it is unbearable, I just let it flow and wish it will wash away these mixed feelings.

Long distance is never been easy for me, friends. It’s always emotional when I face the fact I cannot see him when weekend is coming. Chatting via Skype must be enough. Call me exaggerating, but missing someone is painful. It is excruciatingly painful when I miss him but he is not there to hug, or even to be seen. All I can hug is teddy bear you gave me. You said “If you miss me, just hug this teddy and it’s just like you hugging me.” I did, but teddy doesn’t hug back.

Put aside every sadness and tears, the beauty of long distance relationship is when I can finally meet him, after many nights of missing him. I still can remember the smile I have once I walk out of the plane, queuing for immigration, waiting for the baggage and there I see him, the one I long to see after months only looking at his picture. Simply wonderful when I can treasure every moment I can spend with him, because I know that moment won’t last forever and there will be a time I have to say goodbye at the airport. It’s funny how my heart skip a beat every time I’m about to meet him the next day. The butterflies on the stomach, the nervous and exciting feelings all mixed up. It’s just…like going for a first date every time.

Well, there are always two sides of coins, the good and not-so-good side. Long distance relationship is hard, at least for me it is. I may write on the not-so-good side longer, but if I can choose I will stay this way, because all the tears are worth paid by the joy when we meet. I learn to cherish all the time I have, hug and kiss him like it is the last time.